Friday 1 May 2009

Swine Flu

For well over a week now I have been ill. My latest symptom although less of a symptom and more of a excruciating pain is my right ear. Suddenly and in the space of the three hours i slept from midnight until three am it became very angry, started ringing with pain and has cut itself of from the outside world. Noise does not seem to permeate the thick swelling and wax that lies beyond that little black hole. The pain reminds me of the exact same pain was i was a kid who regularly suffered with ear infections and that same pain nobody could take away, I would curl into my duvet, head pressed against the cold wall trying to avoid the pain and the tinnitus rattling around my brain. Having my brain jangled so violently means I am literally nothing, all but reduced to a frail old man losing his marbles and blinded by pain.
It safe to say i have worked my way through the swine flu symptoms one by one starting with the more nasty ones first, the coincidence is funny if not a little unnerving considering my travel movements albeit not Mexico. Watching the endless stream of propaganda masked as news float around my headspace its hard not to feel more ill than one actually is. In reality if it is so, then it is so and i will be fine, it it is as it is supposed to be, then whats one more person in the millions. Its safe to say it has put me on my back at the worse possible time but i guess there is no right time to be so ill the only place that feels right is under a duvet in a bed. A luxury when you are homeless and once again hanging onto life with a feather and a prayer.